While staring blankly into my computer screen “lurking” Facebook and all those good sites I noticed plenty of posts about the latest article of “The Grid”. The cover story “Beyond Gay” has been getting alot of attention…mostly bad, so I decided to read it to find out what all the fuss was about. Once done the article I had questioned why it was getting so many negative reviews? The article talks about how the newer generations of gays aka “Post-mo’s” that have diverted from the over the top gay culture and have decided to be gay is only a trait not a life defining curse. ”…a new generation of twentysomething urban gays—my generation—has the freedom to live exactly the way we want. We have our university degrees, homes and careers. In Toronto, we’ve abandoned the Church Wellesly Village. We’re tattooed and pierced and at the helm of billion-dollar industries like fashion and television… Our sexual orientation is merely secondary to our place in society. We don’t need to categorize or define ourselves as gay, and who we sleep with—mostly men and, hey, sometimes women—isn’t even much of a topic of conversation anymore.” I mean yes alot of gay people still go to Church and Wellesly but alot of gays don’t aswell. I hadn’t gone to the “Village” until my ex dragged me through there one night…I was scared. I didnt understand why gay men and women wanted to only surround themselves with only gay culture. Obviously the older generations had to endure more then my generation so yes I can see why they would want to walk around in leather and booty shorts, from one extreme to the other kind of thing…but I dont feel the need to do those things. “Some say all the gays ever wanted were two things: freedom and choice. I have freedom, and I have choices. I’ve never known a life without them. I don’t want to get married, I never have. I don’t want to raise children, I never have. I suffer from online dating fatigue already and haven’t held a guy’s hand in almost three years. I have all the sex I want, in my own apartment or his, but none of it means anything. I have regular HIV tests, because I’m aware of the importance of sexual health, but I’ve still managed to forget the condom once or twice without freaking out. My parents have never actually heard me say the words “I am gay” because I don’t need to and it really doesn’t matter because they love me all the same. I am a writer who happens to be gay, not the other way around. I’m not fighting the good fight. It was never mine to fight. So what about us? Call us what you want—post-mos, faux gays, straight-acting, bitter queens—we’re the lucky ones.” I have had a easy life, yes teasing here and there, but over all I am blessed to not have to worry if I will get hired,fired,killed etc because of one small trait. I have freedom, I have choices I am able to walk around in short shorts and neon tank tops, dye my hair blonde and red without getting called a fag or yelled at on the street. I can walk around holding a guys hand even kiss in public.. I don’t however because I don’t want to. I don’t need to surround myself with only gay people or go to only gay clubs I am able to makeout with a guy in a “straight bar” and no one would care. I don’t want to own a rainbow flag and have never had the desire to. I know the fight for equality isn’t over and Im not saying there isnt struggle or need to celebrate I am however saying that I myself do not want one word to define me because I am many things and that is only one tiny tiny piece of who I am.
